Korea Womenlink Conducts Survey on Care Experiences and Attitudes
By
Park Ju-yeon
Published
Nov. 11, 2024
Translated
by Marilyn Hook
“People
don’t think of it as a job. Each time I ended up taking care of someone, I was
always not working. There was always an implicit flow of, ‘Everyone else is making
money. They have jobs. So it’s better for you to do it (the caregiving).’ There
are always things like that when you take on care of someone. Why is that? In
reality, if caregiving isn’t done properly and appropriately, people’s lives
are at stake and their quality of life declines. Despite that, people somehow
think it’s not necessary to pay caregivers.”—Participant 6, Korea Womenlink’s “Interviews
on 10 People’s Caregiving Experiences”
Discussions about care are gradually becoming more frequent, and terms such as “care-centered”, “care crisis”, and “care nation” are appearing. Especially since the COVID-19 pandemic began in 2020, “care” has become an important keyword in our society. However, there is still not enough discussion about it.
 |
| On the evening of November 13, 2024, Korea Womenlink hosted “Revolutionary Love: Our Caregiving is Changing the World – A Forum on 1,030 People’s Caregiving Experiences and Alternative Solutions” at the Changbi Seogyo Building in Mapo-gu, Seoul. © Ilda |
Korea Womenlink has announced that this year it began a three-year project called “Revolutionary Love: Our Caregiving is Changing the World” that will seek to expand the conversation on care and transform our society into a care-centered one.
Carers’
biggest difficulties are lack of time, physical burden, and financial burden,
while biggest obstacle to social transformation is long working hours
The
participants in this survey about care experiences and attitudes, which was
conducted online from May 28 to June 22, were 1,000 “citizens with experience
with care.” The results were introduced at the forum by Chae Yun-jin, an
activist from the Gender Equality and Welfare Team of Korea Womenlink, who
began by saying, “The gender of the participants was 75.6% female, 24.3% male,
and 0.1% other,” and, “The age distribution was 54.3% people in their 30s,
21.9% in their 20s, 18.6% in their 40s, 4.8% in their 50s, and 0.4% in their
60s or older.”
First,
the people who have experience providing care. When asked whom they have
cared for, 46.4% answered, “I only have experience caring for people who are my
relatives by blood or legal marriage,” but 53.6% responded, “I have experience
caring for various people.” The most common care recipients for this group
(with multiple responses allowed) were “friends at 22.6%, pets at 22%, and
partners (lovers/non-legal spouses) at 20.2%”.
As
for those who have experience receiving care, 54.6% answered they had
been cared for only by their blood or legal relatives, but 45.2% responded that
they had experience receiving care from various people. Unsurprisingly, the
most common givers of care (with multiple responses allowed) were “friends at
25.5%, and partners (lovers/non-legal spouses) at 19.2%.”
When
asked what they thought about care, 55.6% responded that it was “absolutely
necessary and meaningful work,” 29.6% responded that it was “everyone’s right,”
and 28.3% responded that it was “everyone’s duty.”
The
most common reason that caregiving was felt to be difficult was time. Not
having enough time to spend on caregiving was selected by 43.9% of respondents,
closely followed by the physical difficulty of care (43.7%), the financial
burden involved (40.3%), and the difficult emotional labor involved (31.1%).”
Ms.
Chae also said that in answer to the question of whether our society should
transform into a care-centered one, “With 46.0% saying they strongly agreed and
42.4% saying they somewhat agreed, the total percentage of participants who
agreed was 88.4%.”
As
for the biggest obstacles to this transition that has such widespread support,
they were “lack of time to provide sufficient care due to long working hours
(22.7%), the idea that working is more valuable than providing care (17%), the
perception that society must continue to grow through wage labor (16%),
workplaces that are unfriendly toward care responsibilities (15%), the
devaluation of care as ‘something that anyone can do with ease’ (9%), and the
gender-role stereotype that caregiving is a women’s responsibility (6.6%).”
An
image from the presentation at Korea Womenlink’s “Revolutionary Love: Our
Caregiving is Changing the World – A Forum on 1,030 People’s Caregiving
Experiences and Alternative Solutions” showing responses to the question “What
is preventing our society from transforming from one centered around wage labor
(production) into one centered around care (reproduction)?”
When
asked what they would need in order to give and receive care in the future, the
participants’ answers were, in this order: “social recognition of care (54.1%),
securing time to provide care (36.1%), shortening working hours so that anyone
can provide care while working (34.6%), social support for caregivers (29.9%),
stable housing so that continuous care is possible in my neighborhood (24.8%),
improving the working environment for care workers (21.9%), a public care
system (16.7%), social recognition of caregiving relationships between
non-legal family members (11.9%), men’s participation in caregiving (9.9%), and
introduction and expansion of caregiving education (9.7%).”
Blood
relatives and legal in-laws aren’t the only people in care relationships
In
interviews with 10 people with care experience, there was some talk about blood
relatives or legal in-laws, but also stories about care involving other types
of people.
Ms.
Chae said, “In a patriarchal society, caregiving has long been handled within
the family, so it is easy to think of it as the family’s responsibility even
today. However, handling caregiving within the limited resources of the family
can easily lead to solo caregiving or result in forcing someone to become a
caregiver as a duty or obligation.”
She
continued, “Some interviewees had asked for care from people who were not their
legal family, or had mutual caregiving relationships with such people,” adding,
“Outside of relationships formed through legal marriages or childbirth, we heard
about experiences of care that occurred between people in same-sex partnerships
or intimate cohabiting relationships.”
However,
the process of caring was not easy for these people. There were cases where
they were excluded from or marginalized by society or institutions because they
were not legal family members. There was “the discomfort of the other’s gaze
toward those who were not legal relatives,” and times when “the two people exchanging
care themselves had difficulties over how to structure their care
relationship.”
“What
I regret the most is that when I went to the hospital, (even though as [the
patient’s] same-sex partner I was definitely their family member and guardian)
I said I was a friend. I thought I should have clearly said, ‘I am their
partner.’ Later, I went to a lecture given by a medical social worker and
learned that the hospitals’ claiming that ‘only family members can be guardians’
is not a legal fact, but rather hospitals demanding family members in order to
transfer some kind of responsibility. I regret that I could not be free from
that frame. I just should have made it clear that I was this person’s guardian
in some way.”—Participant 5
There
are also cases where people cannot expect care from their family of origin or
do not want to receive care from them, and so choose others to be their
caregivers.
Ms.
Chae explained, “Participant 8’s friend was a sexual minority who had undergone
gender confirmation surgery without telling [the friend’s] parents, so relying
on the friend’s family of origin for care would have been difficult. In the
end, Participant 8, who had undergone the surgery first, took care of their
friend.”
She
continued, “Participant 3 realized that their younger brother was uncomfortable
having his children see the course of their cancer treatment and that their
mother was already exhausted from caring for her grandchildren. As a result, they
gave up on receiving care from their family of origin and asked for help from their
friends.”
In
addition, “Participant 7 brought into their home and cared for a friend who could
not be cared for by their family of
origin because they had been a victim of domestic violence.”
Ms.
Chae said, “Although it’s not very visible socially, we have already been able
to confirm that citizens are caring for and receiving care from each other
beyond the boundaries of the legal family like this.”
To the
question “Who would you like to give care to and receive care from in the
future?” only 33.7% of respondents answered “only blood relatives or legal
in-laws.” A much greater proportion of respondents said they would like to
exchange care with a variety of people. Source: Presentation given at Korea
Womenlink’s “Revolutionary Love: Our Caregiving is Changing the World – A Forum
on 1,030 People’s Caregiving Experiences and Alternative Solutions”
‘It’s true that caregiving is dirty and
difficult work’
Ms.
Chae also said, “When we asked the interviewees, ‘What is care like?’, one
interviewee said, ‘It’s a fight against poop.’” In fact, care is clearly
difficult, and sometimes dirty and hard work. Also, when a person who usually
gives care is sick, their carer may have to help with or take charge of
housework in addition to nursing them.
“I
think it was a little over a month after my mother was hospitalized. After
waking up my younger sibling and sending them off to school, [I realized] my
younger sibling had made the house look like a neglected barn or something. I
thought I had done all the cleaning, but when I was vacuuming under their bed,
I saw that they had left their empty plastic bottles there. When I found this
last straw, I just cried. I thought, ‘Why do I have to do this?’ and felt it
was so unfair, and I also thought a lot about my mom. She must have been doing
all these things while I was away. So I cried a lot.”—Participant 9
“Another
difficulty with caregiving is that it is unpredictable,” Ms. Chae explained.
“This problem significantly reduces the quality of life of caregivers. They are
always anxious because they don’t know when they will have to step in, and because
it is difficult to make plans for their own lives and they have to be on
standby all the time, this can easily lead to a sense of helplessness and
become a factor that prevents them from doing regular paid work.”
In
addition, Ms. Chae said the interviewees emphasized that “the tasks of planning
and managing are crucial to caring but not
clearly visible.” She explained, “The tasks of checking for gaps in care,
thinking about care methods that fit the condition or situation of the person
receiving care, and the ‘planning labor’ of closely overseeing the surroundings
and making plans on behalf of the person receiving care are absolutely
necessary.” However, these tasks and labor are overlooked by society.
“But
still—care changed my life”
Ms.
Chae said, “The interviewees also seemed to have a lot to say about the good
things they experienced while caring.” People who had experience caring for
someone said, “We spent a lot of time together, talked a lot, got to know each
other better, and felt closer because of the sense of going through difficult
things together and the sense of becoming this person’s guardian.” Such
experiences of caring also led to other practices of caring.
“When
she was raising me, my grandmother always told me, ‘Whether you’re cleaning the
kimchi pot or whatever, if something gets on your hands, just wash them. Don’t
be afraid to touch something with your hands. Just wash them.’ She always
taught me this. So (when I later had to take care of my grandmother and clean
up her feces and urine), I just did it, thinking, ‘Just wash off the poop.’ It
was nice to be able to use what my grandmother taught me to help her. I think
it made raising my children easier, too.”—Participant 10
Another
meaningful aspect is that through the caregiving experience, one can “gain a
positive sense of self,” thinking, “Ah, I too am a good person who can take
care of others.’”
“I
used to think I was incapable of love. I thought I had no love inside me. I
wanted to love and had a desire for love, but I couldn’t find the right person,
and I think it was really hard not being able to love the people I was supposed
to. But after taking care of my mother, I thought, ‘I am a person who can love
like this,’ and especially when I got my cats, I felt like that— ‘I am a person
who can love someone like this. I’m really good.’” —Participant 1
 |
| Part of Korea Womenlink’s online survey asked participants to fill in the blank in the sentence “Care is ________.” with whatever came to mind. “Love” was the most popular response, with “interest,” “consideration, “happiness,” “sacrifice,” and “a responsibility” also frequent. |
When
it’s hard to imagine your future self receiving care…
Men
need to experience being responsible for care, not just ‘helping out’ with it
The
experience of care leads to many emotions and lessons, and many interviewees
interpreted it positively. However, Ms. Chae said, “The majority of
interviewees had difficulty imagining their future selves receiving care.” This
may also mean that our society has a long way to go before it transitions to a
care-centered society.
At
the forum, speakers pointed out the need for care education, more chances to experience
and discuss care, creating a ‘care network’, and the importance of men engaging
in care. These changes should be made in conjunction with the breaking down of gender
role stereotypes.
Participant
4, the only male participant among the 10 interviewees, spoke about the problem
of men’s lack of experience in caregiving: “I tell other men that they should
not simply help with childcare on the weekends, but that they should take
parental leave and take full responsibility for their children. They need to have
the experience of taking responsibility for caregiving and actively solving
caregiving issues in order to understand the difficulties women go through with
childcare and caregiving.”
“Since my kid started going to daycare, I’ve
gotten to know other moms and dads. But I can’t communicate with the dads. I
don’t know. [It’s like,] ‘Wait, they take care of the kids together, why don’t
they know this?’ I didn’t understand it at first, but they can’t seem to get
what I’m saying. We can’t communicate at all. When I looked into why, I found
out that they didn’t take parental leave. They’ve never been the one in charge
of childcare. That’s why we can’t understand each other. Even if I try to talk
to them, I end up talking to the moms. I can’t communicate with the dads. (Laughs)
So I don’t do it as much.”—Participant 4
Ms.
Chae said, “We need businesses that don’t exclude or punish men for participating
in caregiving, as well as an active change in social attitudes,” and added, “Shortening
working hours and changing attitudes in the workplace is also going to be
important.”
In
concluding her presentation, Ms. Chae suggested that we imagine “diverse forms
of care”: “Let’s dream and talk about giving and receiving care with a more creative
imagination.” If we do, she said, “Maybe we too will be able to give and
receive decent care, don’t you think?”
“When the sick person is being really negative,
I hope that [the caregiver] doesn’t get too upset about it and instead simply
interprets it as, ‘This person’s sick right now. Their irritation is probably
hard for them to handle right now, too.’ And I hope that humor always exists
between people. I also hope that I can be someone who creates humor. (Omitted)
I think care is… diverse. I have received care from different people, and each
person’s method was very different and their outward presentations were all
different.”—Participant 3
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